When it comes to the holidays, there’s only one topic more divisive than when to put up the decorations (okay, and maybe the whole real tree vs. fake tree debacle), and that is whether Hallmark Christmas movies are enjoyable. Want someone to open up to you fairly quickly? Ask them if they love a good Hallmark Christmas movie. Most likely, they will have very strong feelings one way or the other. The truth is, I think there is one thing we can all agree on – the plots are a bit predictable. My saying has always been, “There’s comfort in predictability!” For those who do enjoy them, isn’t that why? Because in the end, we know that no matter what happens throughout the movie, everything is going to end up exactly how we want it to in the end.
Unfortunately, it just simply isn’t this way in real life. We know that ultimately, in the end, we always win because of Jesus. However, that doesn’t mean that we won’t have to go through hard things, heartbreak, and disappointment in this life. Things won’t always pan out the way we hope, dream, believe, and pray they will. If we’re not careful, consuming this narrative can disillusion us. Especially when it comes to being single and dreaming of having a “Hallmark moment” where we happen to bump into our perfect-for-us guy at the coffee shop, accidentally spill coffee all over him, and profusely apologize while the weight of the world rests on our shoulder over the problem he will inevitably solve for us.
So, how can we use this as a teaching opportunity for the middle and high school girls in our life who may be desiring to live out these storylines in their own life? You’ll never find “the one”. There’s no such thing as “the one”. This reality is actually very freeing! If there was only one person for everyone, if one person married the wrong person, it would throw everyone else off! Think about how stressful it is trying to determine if someone is “the one”. That is way too much pressure to put on a fallible human! Instead, focus on traits you would expect a godly husband to have one day and cultivating godly character traits in your own self. It’s not about becoming a godly wife or godly husband – if we become godly people, we will become a godly spouse (if that is what the Lord has for us one day). You will never marry a perfect person because perfect people don’t exist. Be honest. If we create unrealistic expectations (this is different than healthy expectations) instead of learning to love people where they are, we will always be miserable in every relationship. No relationship is perfect, and when all we see is a glamorized, perfected version of relationships where the man is constantly swooning over the woman, we will place unfair expectations on the person God may have for us.
Make sure they know to never follow their heart. This may actually be the worst advice ever given, and I have heard it over and over again in Hallmark movies! The Bible warns us that the heart is deceitful above all else (Jer. 17:9). We should seek the wisdom and plan of God, not indulge in our own desires (Isa. 55:8-9)! The enemy is sneaky and often uses things that aren’t necessarily “bad” to derail us. We are created to love and be loved, but when this happens outside of its appropriate context or time, it actually causes a lot of pain, regret, heartbreak, and destruction. When we try and force something to happen because we desire it more than we are desiring God’s will and plan for our life, it never ends well. This is why community and mentorship are so important when it comes to navigating romantic relationships – we are often unable to see red flags or danger zones on our own, and we need others who love us enough to help protect us and keep us focused on the Lord and what matters most.
Marriage isn’t the highest calling. Sadly, historically speaking, the church has almost placed marriage on a higher pedestal than the world. Our lives do not begin the moment we walk down the aisle. Regardless of any season of life, anything we accomplish, any person we befriend – the highest calling is following Jesus. When we begin to celebrate all steps of radical obedience the way we embrace marriage, we will see a generation of girls much more fulfilled in who they are in Christ instead of seeking fulfillment in all the wrong places. Ultimately, this will also lead to more fulfilling, Christ-centered, gospel-driven marriages. When girls pursue marriage for the sake of the gospel because they have been led to pursue everything in life in light of the gospel, we will see ripple effects for generations to come.
Control is an illusion. How often do we as females replay conversations in our mind wondering what we could’ve said, should’ve said, to make things play out differently? The temptation for middle and high school girls to manipulate circumstances or place themselves in situations where they are crossing paths with a boy they have a crush on – these are things we see as regular occurrences in most of their lives. They live for the message notification that may or may not come. They create a narrative in their mind based on a 30-second conversation and side hug goodbye. As mentioned in the beginning, the comfort of a Hallmark movie is the control we feel over knowing exactly what will happen in the end. In reality, no matter how much control we feel we have, we really have none. God is the supreme ruler, King of the Universe, seated high on His throne. When we learn to give in to this reality and embrace having no control instead of fighting for it, we will be able to embrace the moment God is calling us to instead of clinging tightly to what might or might not happen. The freedom we find in Christ comes from embracing His authority in our lives instead of our own (Gal. 5:1).
For scores of cable-television purists across the country, Hallmark has established itself as something of a feel-good pharmacy, its shelves lined with pills and potions in the form of holiday-moored movies helmed by Lacey Chabert and a slew of sexless soap stars. Per Nielsen, the main Hallmark Channel is currently the second-most-watched cable entertainment network of 2023. (The first? HGTV.) Because I’ve seen entirely too many of them, I know that by now the network has produced every kind of Christmas love story: Take The Nine Lives of Christmas, in which a bachelor firefighter finally commits to a veterinary student after taking in a stray cat, or The Christmas Prince, which follows an ambitious journalist who goes undercover and falls for a playboy prince in line for the throne. The collection remains overwhelmingly white and heteronormative (save for The Holiday Sitter, Hallmark’s 2022 foray into queer storytelling) and its formula consistent: Of the romantic leads, there is always one skeptic, one small-town devotee, and, most importantly, at least one paradigm-shifting sacrifice. The outsider—most often a big-city visitor—always decides to stay.
I’ll admit that on being invited to Mystic, Connecticut, for an up-close-and-personal look at the making of Mystic Christmas—one of 40 new films being added to the Hallmark repertoire this year, about a woman who (say it with me now!) reconnects with an ex just in time for cuffing season—I was oddly optimistic. Cynical journalist privately nursing a heartbreak travels to an East Coast village for a story? It sounded like, well, a Hallmark movie. Perhaps somewhere along the way, fate would intervene and I’d forget that not only do I hate Christmas (for complicated reasons that all involve capitalism) but also myself. Because that’s what Hallmark does, after all: It invites one’s delusions in from the bitter cold for a cup of sickly sweet cocoa.
So I headed off to Mystic. Here’s how it all went down.
7:15 a.m. I leave my apartment at least 15 minutes later than planned and without the thermos of coffee I’d prepared for the four-hour train ride from New York City. A few weeks earlier, and for the first time in my 29 years on this planet, I’d told someone I was in love with them—out loud, to their face, and with utter seriousness. Their feelings were complicated and ultimately unreturned. This is not the first occasion on which I’ve been turned down, but it’s singular in that a woman did it, meaning its memory will transcend time and space and tap me on the shoulder when I’m reincarnated as someone even less brave.
7:29 a.m. The train to Mystic departs at 7:41 a.m., and my ETA to Penn Station is 7:35 a.m. Could my late arrival be the catalyst for some kind of meet-cute? In the Hallmark universe, definitely. For all I know, I could hurtle onto the train just as it’s leaving the station and sink into the only available seat—beside a besuited businessman named Nick. As the cityscape slips away, we’d find ourselves engaged in a sparring match as I bemoan Christmas, the audience swiftly gleaning that I’m biting (but not at all bisexual). Meanwhile, he’d reveal he’s heading back to his hometown to save his grandmother’s candy shop from the sticky fingers of capitalism and a local real estate tycoon. Once in Mystic, we’d proceed to run into each other at a tree lighting or a cookie-decorating contest at the local elementary school and then eventually I’d succumb to a life of suburbia as Mrs. Candy Shop. Our movie would be called In the Nick of Time and Rachel Leigh Cook would star as me.
7:41 a.m. I arrive just as the train is pulling away without me. Goodbye, Nick.
9 a.m. Fortunately, I’ve found another train and am now en route, coffee in hand. However, it appears that fate isn’t on board. I don’t have a seatmate, and in fact the car is damn near empty. This is nothing like The Christmas Train or, hell, even Love at First Glance. Oh, well. Plenty of time to stare wistfully out the window and replay the exact moment of my most recent rejection to the mournful melodies of Caroline Polachek. Back in the city, I’m just another girl in a sweater.
1:02 p.m. I’ve arrived at a one-room station-slash-café called Mystic Depot Roasters. Two elderly women stop eating their lunch to study me from head to toe. To them, I am likely every bit the big-city trope, in six-inch platform boots. But because in this movie, they’re also tropes, they quickly return to gossiping about the locals. I order a latte and reread the synopsis of Mystic Christmas. The lead, Juniper Jones, a marine veterinarian, returns home to Mystic for a job at a rehabilitation center and aquarium during the holidays and rekindles her long-extinguished flame with Sawyer Adams, a pizza-shop owner. Tale as old as time.
1:15 p.m. Aided by Google Maps, I make my way into town, and an older gentleman proceeds to lay on the horn after I jaywalk in front of his truck. “I could be a cop!” he yells out the window. This would never happen to Autumn Reeser.
1:21 p.m. I suddenly understand why this seaport has served as a filming location for at least 40 movies and television shows. Mystic, with all its quaint streets and waterfront views, is very charming. When a gaggle of fishermen catcalls me from a boat near the famed Bascule Bridge, I don’t mind it nearly as much as I do when I realize the Mystic Massacre that took place here in 1637 is not referenced anywhere in the vicinity.
1:29 p.m. I have some time before I’m due on set, so I peruse a bookstore in town. I wonder for a moment whether a Hallmark movie has ever been set between the stacks and google it. Sure enough, there’s Love by the Book, which follows the story of Emma, a bookstore owner caught between two suitors. I pick out a collection of heart-wrenching queer love letters from throughout history that seems appropriate given my current state and imagine another meet-cute with the person behind the register.
1:34 p.m. Nope. I’m checked out by a graying woman who looks a lot like someone who insists she doesn’t watch Hallmark because it’s intellectually beneath her. My purchase gives her pause. “Just this?” she prompts. Perhaps I’m imagining a measure of disapproval in her tone, but I’m tempted to inform her that everyone’s a little gay—even people on Hallmark.
1:37 p.m. After looking into a few more shops, I decide I must pay homage to rom-com mecca: the real-life Mystic Pizza. The restaurant doesn’t bear much resemblance to what’s seen in its 1988 namesake starring Julia Roberts. In fact, it’s less a small-town slice slinger than an altar to Hollywood and the tourism industry, given every square inch of its walls is bedecked with autographed film posters and paraphernalia. Except, that is, for the 20-something employee who greets me from behind the bar. Maybe it’s the feigned politeness with which she addresses the other out-of-towners behind me or that she looks like she’d hang out with the Araujo sisters. I take a seat and order a beer.
1:50 p.m. Enough Hollywood folks have come through these parts that everyone’s got a story about a celebrity sighting. I’m no different, and I’m here to see the magic of Hallmark unfold in real-time. As I sip my beer, I can’t help but think about how Hallmark movies have a way of dominating our lives and personalities, especially during the holiday season. They offer a predictable escape, a comforting narrative where everything works out in the end, unlike the complexities of real life.
Source: Various sources
